ME, MYSELF AND GOD

As I sit and write, a few things come to mind, do I share or go through the process privately. I've decided to share with you because I am very excited to be in this place. What is this place you maybe wondering, it's a beautiful place that is peaceful, serene, and full of love, the place is my heart. With reflection, love, peace, and gratitude I've gotten to a great place in my life.

But it wasn't always like that, for 25 years I've been working in an industry that hurt my soul. Piece by piece, day by day I was deteriorating. Although I met some incredible people, it wasn't where I was suppose to be. Through it all I still woke up each day, put on my happy face and went to work. After work I would come home, take care of my family and so on. I was always sad, mad, angry, or just plain tired. Growing up with hardships created so much sadness, and disappointment in my life. 

However, things started to change....Back in May I went off work to have surgery. While I was off my work closed, and I was permanently laid off. Most people would be devastated, but I was absolutely thrilled. Thankfully my co-workers were able to re-locate and keep their jobs, but I was given an option. I prayed so hard for that outcome. It was risky but I knew God was clearing my path. Since being home the past several months great things are happening. I don't mean material or monetarily but within myself. 

I heard about people being Christian's or being spiritual and I never knew what it meant. I wanted to get in touch with myself so I started reading, and asking questions. What really helped me through my process was reading "Produced By Faith" by Devon Franklin, and I have to say if you are ever at a crossroads in your life, this book will help you sort it out. It did me! One of the biggest take away's from Devon's book was to listen to the signs God was/is giving me. By listening to the signs, I know I'm on the right path because he has guided me here.

Almost 2 years ago my husband became a Christian I was confused. I was like, what does that mean for us? I wasn't sure if he would become someone I didn't know. We were on two totally different pages, and I couldn't understand what was happening to him. But over the past couple of years I've seen how it affected his life in such a positive way. He has always been such a great person, now, he is that much better. One of the things I admire about Kevin is not comprising his Christian principals, and stands firm with his beliefs.

Listening to Kevin's family, I would often hear them talk about their faith, and I could never truly understand. I respect their faith but wanted to know more. Over the past year I would ask my husband, what does being a Christian mean and what does it feel like to be a Christian. I was not being ignorant, I was trying to open my heart and embrace the lord, I just didn't know how. After my husband described how he felt, and what it all meant, I wanted to feel it to, but knew I had to go at my own pace. I didn't think I could even go there, but opening my heart has allowed so many opportunities.

I started praying everyday for the last couple of months, and good things started happening. Over the past several months, I have gotten to such a great place. I am at peace with myself, I am happier then I've ever been, and I am content in my life. I've been having moments of joy, and unexplainable happiness. I now know that all of the hardships I endured were lessons from God. You have to go through all these things in life to build your wisdom, without your wisdom who are you? I look back and completely understand it all now. My calling is to be of service to people, and if I didn't go through everything, what could I offer. With my wisdom and knowledge I can help so many people. I look at it all as a gift.

My dream has always been to create a "Safe House". I envisioned it since I was a child, it was always a safe place for families to go to for support, refuge, crisis, sports, wellness, resources etc...In my vision I always seen the facility surrounded by alot of greenery, fresh smelling air, pretty flowers, and lots of trees. To know this vision is happening is crazy. Not only will my vision be a reality, it will be exactly where I dreamt it to be...Newfoundland. Within the next year or two, I will be transitioning to Newfoundland and help build a recreational center. How crazy exciting is that! 

So in closing, people have asked, well how does being a Christian change you...My answer is simple, I am still Shelley, I am still funny, but now I believe in God, and love what the Lord has done for me. I have a happy heart, I am at peace, and in touch with myself. Having the lord in my life makes me a better person. This is all new to me, and I embrace all of my future learnings.

I also wanted to share with you, I had two vivid dreams/visions this past week. It was dreams of Jesus welcoming me with a prayer, his hands were stretched out, and offered his presence in my life. I looked up Dream Definitions because nothing like this has happened before, and it was interesting what I read. It all resonated so much: 

Jesus:

To see Jesus in your dream, foretells that your greatest desires and goals will be realized. This dream serves to console and strengthen you in your times of adversity, hardship and struggle. You will rise above any situation and circumstance and become victorious.

To dream that Jesus speaks to you or that you are praying with Him, signifies that you will be blessed with true peace of mind, joy and contentment.

Thanks for stopping by and taking time to read Me, Myself, and God...

Much Love,
Shelley

READY...SET...PAUSE

So often decisions are made with not much thought going into them, sometimes those decisions are hasty decisions, sometimes you spend to much time over thinking, and over analyzing your decisions.  Then possibly you regret the decisions you made. I am guilty at times for making quick decisions, and then regretting them later. We probably all have done that from time to time. Recently I learned a valuable lesson about pausing, my head was spinning and I could not come up with a decision. I've been going to Newfoundland for the past 8 years and have wanted to live there ever since, it's where my heart is. But I always said I will wait until my older kids are in college and then we will move. My son is 18 yrs old and in his first year of college, and my daughter is 16 yrs old and in grade 11.

With recent circumstances happening, we have the opportunity to move to Newfoundland in November. My husband's work location is closing down, and all of the work is being moved to the U.S. His company has a location in Vaughan Ontario, and has offered him a position there, not sure what he will be doing, but the transfer is there if he wants.

When my husband called me a couple of weeks ago to tell me this news, at first I was so excited, I could hardly contain myself, I was like yes I want to go. I said to my husband don't say anything as yet, we will talk about it tonight, but yes I want to go. I started a mental checklist, and said okay let me talk to Ryan and Brianna and get their feel on it. When I talked to my kids about the possibility of me moving there, my son said if it makes you happy, and my daughter was very upset. Neither one would move there with me. They were born and raised in Ontario, and this is where they want to stay. 

When my husband posed the question to me, I thought I have to talk to a few people that are helping me with my business. My best and longest friend Jody, my school friend Connie, and my friend/mentor/colleague Jan are all helping me get to the next level with my business. I owe it to them. I instantly sent an email off to Jody and explained that I was going to move, emailed Connie, and phoned Jan.

So as the day went on, it started shifting a little bit for me, and then all of a sudden I was like Whoaaa slow down Shelley, you can't just pick up and move well over 2000 km's without a plan. I then turned to the OWN Ambassadors for some insight, and advice, which they gave so lovingly. The biggest take away was to PAUSE. Then I started thinking, well wait my husbands work wasn't looking for an answer right away, so why do I feel the need to decide so quickly. 

With a move to Newfoundland I will be affecting alot of people and plans, so I have to be patient until it feels right. Each day my husband would ask, and I said I am not prepared to answer, when I do, you will be the first to know (Obviously). He was leaving the decision up to me, one I am not comfortable with. If it was up to him, he would be gone, but he respects my decisions. I began the homework a couple of weeks ago, I weighed the pro's vs con's, and did some self perspective coaching. I also spoke with a few individuals who helped me walk through the decision without passing judgement.

My dream has always been to have a "Safe House" for families to go to as a place of refuge, resource, support and wellness. I have the abilities in the near future in Newfoundland, very excited about it, but it is at the very beginning stages, and they are not quite ready for me as yet. Here in Ontario, there are alot of exciting things happening with the ladies I mentioned above. If I left now, it would be such a disservice to them because they have been so accommodating, helpful, resourceful and spent alot of their time helping me get to the next level with my business. 

Since May, I've been home, and one of the areas in my life I wanted to work on is the ability to connect with my soul. Over this latest decision, I dug deep and really searched my heart and soul. What kept coming up for me was, it's not quite the right time. If you ever have a feeling, whisper, or a sixth sense, you need to listen to it, do not ignore it. You are born with that gift, listen to it when you feel it, it will not steer you wrong.

If great things happen in Ontario, and my business takes off, I will have to make another decision that will be made with a long PAUSE in between. Do I stay or do I go? To Be Continued....

Think about this question.....Do you make your decisions quickly? Or do you take time to think about your decisions?

This was a great lesson learned. Pausing really is a beautiful thing!

Much Love,
Shelley

♥♥ HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS ♥♥

Heart is where the home is - Right in front of Uncle Bert's House

The anticipation, the excitement and the love I feel as I prepare for my trip to Newfoundland. I update my Twitter and Facebook status one last time before we head out. I finished packing our bags, hubby arrives home from work & showers, I feed the cat, call my kids, say good-bye, and called the taxi, now we just wait for the taxi to pick us up and then we are off. The taxi arrives, I am running around making sure everything is turned off and unplugged, grabbed Kayla's baby (We could never forget her baby), Kevin grabs the suit cases, sets her carseat up in the taxi, and WE'RE OFF.

Yippeee, I can't wait to get there to smell the fresh air, the salt water, and most importantly, wrap my arms around my Mother In Law. We check in, go through security, and head over to wait for our flight. Time to board, off we go, walked down the mobile corridor to our plane, and got all settled in our seats. I had the window seat, Kayla was in the middle, and my husband was in the aisle seat. After getting all situated the pilot comes on and said there is a technical issue that is currently being addressed, we will have a short delay and then we will be off. That delay was about 30 mins, it felt like it was forever. The excitement was about to jump out of my chest. All things a go, we taxi to the run way, and up and away we go.

As we hover over the clouds, it starts to get a little bumpy. I was like okay no problem, a little turbulence no big deal, as we start going at a higher altitude and about an hour into our flight things got scary. I've been flying off and on for years, and generally have had a good flight, this is the second time the flight has been scary. This one though we were flying for a while, and the turbulence got real scary. People were gasping, holding onto their seats, kids started to whimper and cry. Kayla looked at me and said Mommy, what's wrong these bumps are silly. I tried not to show how absolutely terrified I was. I looked at Kevin, he looked at me, and I was as white as a ghost, his knuckles were pure white from holding on to the arm rests so hard. The plane was dropping feet, the pilot came on told everyone to get to their seats, and also told the stewardess to return to their seats. You see the carts flying by with the stewardess rushing back to their seats. The pilot comes on and indicates we will be going through some turbulence for 10 to 15 mins, so I braced myself for those few minutes. In actuality it ended up being about 2 hours. My body ached, I was having chest pains. It felt like I was bracing myself for an accident for 2 hours. I prayed the plane wasn't going to go down, I know extreme, but I have never felt turbulence like that, we were terrified. Kevin and I looked at each other, whispered I love you, and Kev said be strong, the tears started to welt up in my eyes. The anticipation of the unknown left my body very sore and I ached so much. By the time we landed I had a headache, I was shaking, and my body was in agony. The aches didn't go away for about 4 days. Never so glad to get off a flight!

When we got off the plane, we headed down the stairs at St. John's Airport. What I love about the airport is you go down these big sets of stairs, almost like a princess coming down to her prince. Except it wasn't my prince, he was already beside me, it was my Mother In Law (MIL) and her beautiful smile. Kayla let go of my hand and ran, it was like the airport stopped, and all you could hear was Kayla screaming out Nanny Nanny I missed you, I am in Newfoundland now. Kayla and Nanny embraced, then Kevin and I joined in, it was a beautiful thing. Ahhh now I can let all my stresses go, and cherish our time.

Puzzle Time - Some good simple family time

The drive from St. John's was a good one, we saw 9 moose, but thankfully they stayed on the side of the road and never bothered us. It was late, we decided to take a night flight on Thursday so we have all day Friday in Bonavista.  It was not long into the 3 hour drive when Kayla fell asleep, it then gave me a chance to talk to my MIL, held her hand and just feeling so happy to be In Newfoundland. We arrived in Bonavista at 1:30 am, and Kevin's Uncle Bert (he is just like his father) waited up for us, we were all so tired, except for Kayla she had a power nap, and full of energy. We stopped in and visited for few minutes and headed back to my MIL's house where we stay while in Newfoundland.

Friday we woke up and so happy to be in Bonavista, one thing for sure, the sleep you get in Newfoundland is the best sleep you could probably get anywhere. The fresh air, the smell of salt water, and the stillness makes for great sleeping. Now if there is a bit of wind or rain, it gets a little more challenging, but you get used to it. Overall the weather was good a few rainy or windy days here and there but for the most part it was beautiful each day. One of the things I love is how Uncle Bertie can predict the weather from the way the wind is blows. He lives right by the ocean, and with the tides and the wind we have our own personal weather man LOL. He is always dead on, it is pretty remarkable. Living in Newfoundland for almost 80 years I guess he has some experience under his belt, or shall I say his suspenders lol. So blessed to have this man in our lives!

Uncle Bert - Our personal weather man

Each day was a new day for adventures, we did the typical Bonavista touristy things as we do every year and we visited family and friends. Even thought we had 2.5 weeks there, we weren't able to get around to see everyone, it is hard to fit it all in. Every lunch and dinner was planned, so time was definitely limited. There was one day in particular where Ruby (MIL) her friend, and myself were trying on different dresses in my MIL's house and we started dancing and singing around in the kitchen.  We were were having a blast, if people saw us they may have thought we were crazy. We were having so much fun and then my husband was outside and scared us by howling through an open window in the kitchen. We all screamed and jumped, it was hilarious. It was one of those "You had to be there" moments.

When we are in Bonavista for the 3 weekends, we attend church, if I was living there I could see myself attending each week. I love the atmosphere, the energy, and the gospel singing. When you enter in the Grace Pentecostal Church (MIL's church) they greet you with such pleasantries and welcome you to their church. We also attend Memorial United Church (Uncle Bert's Church) which is such a wonderful church too. The people are warm and friendly you feel so welcomed when you enter the church, although it is a large church you still feel like family when you are there.

One night, Ruby, Christine (Aunt), Teri-Lynn (Cousin) and I attended the Rising Tide Theater in Trinity Newfoundland  to watch" I Love You Your Perfect Now Change". What a beautiful little quaint town, I really enjoyed the town and the play was excellent, I had no idea it even existed. This will be a must when we go to Newfoundland every year. It is about a 45 min to an hour drive from Bonavista and what a great spot. Once the theater was over, we headed home, it was dark and chilly. After driving for a few minutes we started smelling smoke coming from the car, it gave us a bit of a scare, so we stopped at the side of the road. The ladies said maybe we should check the tires, so I said to Christine hand me your phone so I can use it as a light. I went around checking the tires, and looking out for moose & coyote, they can come from anywhere. It was so dark, the ladies said never mind Shelley get back in the car, they called a family member to come pick us up. The thing that surprised me the most, was that almost every single person stopped to see if we needed help. Say 20 people stopped, 2 people didn't, and half the people that stopped said they would drive behind us home (for 1 hr) until we reached our destination safely. Wow, you wouldn't find people doing that here in the Toronto area.

One of the highlights every year is the time I take to go off by myself and journal, it is one of my favourite things to do each year.  When I look at the ocean, the metaphor that comes up for me is feeling free, and the cycle of life. As I watch the tide come in and go over the rocks  it reminds me of life. We all have obstacles, and challenges like the ocean. With the ocean there is movement around obstacles, and then is grounded by the shore. We overcome  challenges by movement and find what grounds us, just like the shore does to the sea.
I feel so at peace by the ocean...Movement is the cycle of life!

So in closing, I have attached a few snap shots from our trip...

The "seat" where I journal

Rising Tide Theatre - Trinity Newofundland

Trinity Mercantile

Sunset "Down Below" - Bonavista Newfoundland

Grace Pentecostal Church - Bonavista Newfoundland

Memorial United Church - Bonavista Newfoundland

Thanks for stopping by...

Much Love xoxo
Shelley