♥♥ HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS ♥♥

Heart is where the home is - Right in front of Uncle Bert's House

The anticipation, the excitement and the love I feel as I prepare for my trip to Newfoundland. I update my Twitter and Facebook status one last time before we head out. I finished packing our bags, hubby arrives home from work & showers, I feed the cat, call my kids, say good-bye, and called the taxi, now we just wait for the taxi to pick us up and then we are off. The taxi arrives, I am running around making sure everything is turned off and unplugged, grabbed Kayla's baby (We could never forget her baby), Kevin grabs the suit cases, sets her carseat up in the taxi, and WE'RE OFF.

Yippeee, I can't wait to get there to smell the fresh air, the salt water, and most importantly, wrap my arms around my Mother In Law. We check in, go through security, and head over to wait for our flight. Time to board, off we go, walked down the mobile corridor to our plane, and got all settled in our seats. I had the window seat, Kayla was in the middle, and my husband was in the aisle seat. After getting all situated the pilot comes on and said there is a technical issue that is currently being addressed, we will have a short delay and then we will be off. That delay was about 30 mins, it felt like it was forever. The excitement was about to jump out of my chest. All things a go, we taxi to the run way, and up and away we go.

As we hover over the clouds, it starts to get a little bumpy. I was like okay no problem, a little turbulence no big deal, as we start going at a higher altitude and about an hour into our flight things got scary. I've been flying off and on for years, and generally have had a good flight, this is the second time the flight has been scary. This one though we were flying for a while, and the turbulence got real scary. People were gasping, holding onto their seats, kids started to whimper and cry. Kayla looked at me and said Mommy, what's wrong these bumps are silly. I tried not to show how absolutely terrified I was. I looked at Kevin, he looked at me, and I was as white as a ghost, his knuckles were pure white from holding on to the arm rests so hard. The plane was dropping feet, the pilot came on told everyone to get to their seats, and also told the stewardess to return to their seats. You see the carts flying by with the stewardess rushing back to their seats. The pilot comes on and indicates we will be going through some turbulence for 10 to 15 mins, so I braced myself for those few minutes. In actuality it ended up being about 2 hours. My body ached, I was having chest pains. It felt like I was bracing myself for an accident for 2 hours. I prayed the plane wasn't going to go down, I know extreme, but I have never felt turbulence like that, we were terrified. Kevin and I looked at each other, whispered I love you, and Kev said be strong, the tears started to welt up in my eyes. The anticipation of the unknown left my body very sore and I ached so much. By the time we landed I had a headache, I was shaking, and my body was in agony. The aches didn't go away for about 4 days. Never so glad to get off a flight!

When we got off the plane, we headed down the stairs at St. John's Airport. What I love about the airport is you go down these big sets of stairs, almost like a princess coming down to her prince. Except it wasn't my prince, he was already beside me, it was my Mother In Law (MIL) and her beautiful smile. Kayla let go of my hand and ran, it was like the airport stopped, and all you could hear was Kayla screaming out Nanny Nanny I missed you, I am in Newfoundland now. Kayla and Nanny embraced, then Kevin and I joined in, it was a beautiful thing. Ahhh now I can let all my stresses go, and cherish our time.

Puzzle Time - Some good simple family time

The drive from St. John's was a good one, we saw 9 moose, but thankfully they stayed on the side of the road and never bothered us. It was late, we decided to take a night flight on Thursday so we have all day Friday in Bonavista.  It was not long into the 3 hour drive when Kayla fell asleep, it then gave me a chance to talk to my MIL, held her hand and just feeling so happy to be In Newfoundland. We arrived in Bonavista at 1:30 am, and Kevin's Uncle Bert (he is just like his father) waited up for us, we were all so tired, except for Kayla she had a power nap, and full of energy. We stopped in and visited for few minutes and headed back to my MIL's house where we stay while in Newfoundland.

Friday we woke up and so happy to be in Bonavista, one thing for sure, the sleep you get in Newfoundland is the best sleep you could probably get anywhere. The fresh air, the smell of salt water, and the stillness makes for great sleeping. Now if there is a bit of wind or rain, it gets a little more challenging, but you get used to it. Overall the weather was good a few rainy or windy days here and there but for the most part it was beautiful each day. One of the things I love is how Uncle Bertie can predict the weather from the way the wind is blows. He lives right by the ocean, and with the tides and the wind we have our own personal weather man LOL. He is always dead on, it is pretty remarkable. Living in Newfoundland for almost 80 years I guess he has some experience under his belt, or shall I say his suspenders lol. So blessed to have this man in our lives!

Uncle Bert - Our personal weather man

Each day was a new day for adventures, we did the typical Bonavista touristy things as we do every year and we visited family and friends. Even thought we had 2.5 weeks there, we weren't able to get around to see everyone, it is hard to fit it all in. Every lunch and dinner was planned, so time was definitely limited. There was one day in particular where Ruby (MIL) her friend, and myself were trying on different dresses in my MIL's house and we started dancing and singing around in the kitchen.  We were were having a blast, if people saw us they may have thought we were crazy. We were having so much fun and then my husband was outside and scared us by howling through an open window in the kitchen. We all screamed and jumped, it was hilarious. It was one of those "You had to be there" moments.

When we are in Bonavista for the 3 weekends, we attend church, if I was living there I could see myself attending each week. I love the atmosphere, the energy, and the gospel singing. When you enter in the Grace Pentecostal Church (MIL's church) they greet you with such pleasantries and welcome you to their church. We also attend Memorial United Church (Uncle Bert's Church) which is such a wonderful church too. The people are warm and friendly you feel so welcomed when you enter the church, although it is a large church you still feel like family when you are there.

One night, Ruby, Christine (Aunt), Teri-Lynn (Cousin) and I attended the Rising Tide Theater in Trinity Newfoundland  to watch" I Love You Your Perfect Now Change". What a beautiful little quaint town, I really enjoyed the town and the play was excellent, I had no idea it even existed. This will be a must when we go to Newfoundland every year. It is about a 45 min to an hour drive from Bonavista and what a great spot. Once the theater was over, we headed home, it was dark and chilly. After driving for a few minutes we started smelling smoke coming from the car, it gave us a bit of a scare, so we stopped at the side of the road. The ladies said maybe we should check the tires, so I said to Christine hand me your phone so I can use it as a light. I went around checking the tires, and looking out for moose & coyote, they can come from anywhere. It was so dark, the ladies said never mind Shelley get back in the car, they called a family member to come pick us up. The thing that surprised me the most, was that almost every single person stopped to see if we needed help. Say 20 people stopped, 2 people didn't, and half the people that stopped said they would drive behind us home (for 1 hr) until we reached our destination safely. Wow, you wouldn't find people doing that here in the Toronto area.

One of the highlights every year is the time I take to go off by myself and journal, it is one of my favourite things to do each year.  When I look at the ocean, the metaphor that comes up for me is feeling free, and the cycle of life. As I watch the tide come in and go over the rocks  it reminds me of life. We all have obstacles, and challenges like the ocean. With the ocean there is movement around obstacles, and then is grounded by the shore. We overcome  challenges by movement and find what grounds us, just like the shore does to the sea.
I feel so at peace by the ocean...Movement is the cycle of life!

So in closing, I have attached a few snap shots from our trip...

The "seat" where I journal

Rising Tide Theatre - Trinity Newofundland

Trinity Mercantile

Sunset "Down Below" - Bonavista Newfoundland

Grace Pentecostal Church - Bonavista Newfoundland

Memorial United Church - Bonavista Newfoundland

Thanks for stopping by...

Much Love xoxo
Shelley

In Loving Memory ~ Dedicated to Kyle Miotto

Kyle Miotto - His family were coming back from vacation in PEI, and while driving home they were traveling through New Brunswick on July 28th, 2012 when the horrific accident happened, the family had sustained injuries, and Kyle was seriously injured. On Aug 6th, 2012 he succumb to his injuries, and past away with his family by his side. They feel blessed to have had the memories while being together on vacation. Kyle's last days were spent doing what he loved to do, spending time with family, fishing and having a ton of fun.

As I sat in Islington United Church in Toronto today, I was reflecting on life with my children. I drove Ryan and his friends to Kyle's funeral, Kyle was one Ryan's closest friends. I never knew him well, he had been to my place a couple of times, and I spoke to him briefly, Kyle spent more time at my son's Dad's house. When the boys walked in my home, I introduced myself to them, and and off they went downstairs to play video games. Shortly after, they would leave, and I said bye Kyle, it was nice to meet you, see you again. I never realized that I would never see him again. What struck out to me was his big smile, and his pleasant demeanor.

The church had so many people, there was not an empty seat, it was so full, we sat upstairs and watched from above. What stood out to me, was the love by so many people. As I looked around, I could see many tears shed, thinking what memories do they have of Kyle. I looked at my son, and I could see he was having a hard time, this was his first funeral. How sad, the first funeral he had to attend was one of his greatest friends. It was very difficult to look around and see all the sadness, but yet it was beautiful because you could just feel so much love. Listening to the stories of Kyle warmed my heart, I feel like I got to really know Kyle today, and to know he was a friend and a part of Ryan's life was a great feeling. These are the kids you want your kids to be friends with.

When Kyle's aunt read his eulogy, I was crying with sadness, but laughing at their humour, some stories were very funny, and I appreciated hearing the stories. The family is close, and it was apparent, the family members were handing kleenex's to each other, leaving one's seat to comfort someone in another seat, hugging another's child, there was so much love, and you could feel it. Looking around there was not a dry eye, including mine.

When a family member spoke on behalf of Kyle's mother, she described how her relationship was with her son, it sounded beautiful, she was his best friend, he was not like a typical teenager, he communicated with his mom, and they had a very open relationship. One of the stories they shared was, one day Lynda (his mother) went to the patio, and asked Kyle, are you writing a new song, and he said no I am writing 15 Commandments to live by. Kyle was an aspiring musician, who loved playing the guitar. He loved working with wood, and when he "grew up" he wanted to make guitars. Kyle recently graduated, he was becoming quite the successful young man.

When Kyle's father spoke, he talked about how much he   loved playing with soliders, and had a bucket of them. He said we are all soliders, but we have now lost our commander in chief. He also indicated that he will be caring around Kyle's Fifteen Commandments, I am hoping to get a copy too. 

Although I didn't know him well, I think to myself, what if that was my child. Having a child the same age, I started reflecting how precious life is, and I cannot imagine what it is like to lose a child. My heart goes out to anyone who loses their child. What I took away from today was to love each day like it is your last. You don't know what tomorrow will bring, each day you tell your kids you love them, and don't ever take life for granted.

 Once the service was over, we attended the reception in the Church hall, we mingle through the crowd and walked towards the collage of pictures to look at the life of Kyle. While we were over there, Ryan and I got very emotional, when Lynda (Kyle's Mom) notice how upset we were she came over to us and hugged us and thanked us for coming, and she said I know this is very hard. How incredible she came over to comfort us, when all I wanted to do was comfort her, that shows just how incredible she is. I turned to her and I said I am so sorry for your loss, he was a great friend to my son. 

Lynda's picture from Basin Head PEI

I'd like to close with the poem that was noted on Kyle's Funeral Card;

I'd like the memory of me
To be a happy one
I'd like to leave an afterglow
Of smiles when the day is done.

I’d like to leave an echo
Whispering softly down the ways,
Of happy times, and laughing times
And bright sunny days.

I’d like the tears of those who grieve
To dry before the sun
Of happy memories that I leave
Behind ~ when the day is done.

Dedicated to Kyle Miotto - Oct.19th 1994 - Aug.6th 2012 - R.I.P

As my son Ryan said "This train is bound for glory"

Children are the hands by which we take hold of heaven...Hug them each day and tell them you love them

Much Love  Shelley Harris & Family

Love Your Children

The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal - 12 Themed Workshops

Personal Renewal Group

In addition to Personal Best Life Coaching Services http://www.personalbestlifecoaching.net/ we facilitate Mom’s Groups  based on "The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal", we offer services individually, in groups or to organizations. Our service also provides personal coaching to Individuals and/or Families as well.

The group empowers, supports and inspires women and their families to define and create the lives they desire, experience greater life balance and enhance overall physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.

Often us Mom's get lost along the way, life gets ahead of us, and we lose who we once were. With the support from a Certified Life Balance Coach, and a group of like minded women we support and encourage each other throughout our journey. The groups are empowering workshops where it allows individuals to reconnect with who they are. This can be done in a 6 month workshop meeting bi-weekly, or a 12 month workshop meeting monthly.  

Each month there will be a new theme where we discuss, journal, and reflect. It is a fantastic community of like-minded people who set time aside to do something for themselves. Are you willing to give yourself one of the most important gifts of all...YOU? The greatest gift you could give yourself and your family is participating in something that is so important. "Self-Care is not about self-indulgence, it is about self-preservation" Audre Lord

The program is based on "The Mother's Guide to Self Renewal, How to Reclaim, Rejuvenate and Re-Balance Your Life" by Nationally recognized Career and Life Balance Coach/Author Renee Trudeau.  Each member that joins will receive a copy.

The Cost is $225.00 for 6 month workshop meeting bi-weekly, or a 12 month, each workshop will be approx 2 hrs.

Groups will be held in Brampton, and if you can have 7+ Mom's join in the GTA, or South Western Ontario, I can come to you.

 ********************************************************************************************************************

Details about the Workshops

PERSONAL RENEWAL GROUP FOR MOTHERS

Date, Time and Location To Be Determined

Are you interested in reconnecting with “who you are” and living the life you truly desire?

Would you like to learn how to make your physical/mental/spiritual/emotional

self-care a priority and why it’s key to living, loving and parenting optimally?

Could you use support in gaining clarity and focus on how to allocate your energy and experience more balance in your life?

Supportive, nurturing and empowering, The Personal Renewal Group for Mothers is a successful 6-year old, Austin (Texas) based group coaching program for moms created specifically to explore and learn 1) how to "reconnect" with who you are, 2) strategies for making self-care/nurturance a priority so you can live, love and parent optimally and 3) how to experience greater life balance. The program is based on career/life balance coach Renee Trudeau’s new book The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal: How to Reclaim, Rejuvenate and Re-Balance Your Life.

Topics for the 2012 Personal Renewal Group may include:

The Transformative Power of Self Care (on a physical, mental, spiritual and emotional level)

Reconnecting with Who You Are, Nurturing Your Essence

Good is Good Enough: A Mother’s Mantra

Motherhood as a Spiritual Journey

Unleashing Your Creativity and Reclaiming Adventure in Our Lives

Life Balance: Insights and Strategies for Balanced Living

Managing Our Energy, Saying “No” and Asking for Help

Feedback from 2011 Personal Renewal Group participants:

“I love the powerful, deep nature of this work, it has made a huge difference in my life.” Susan

“PRG helped me not beat myself up so much. My new mantra (since coming) is 'good is good enough!' "---Paula

"I can’t put into words how much I appreciate this work and how it has affected my thinking and ‘being’—as a woman and a parent.”--Amanda

"I was concerned about spending $ because our budget is really tight. Wow, am I glad I decided to do PRG. This has been a truly meaningful and life-changing experience for me. Kristan

"The open, safe environment for sharing was amazing. I’ve never seen anything like it. I felt comfortable to say anything. The women were amazing.”--Maria

"I loved being challenged to make my self-care a priority; PRG has made a huge difference in my life.” --Kristen

"The exercises on saying no (boundaries), setting intentions and managing our energy were profound—Janet

About the Facilitator:

My name is Shelley Harris, a Certified Life Balance Coach, mother of 3 (18 yr old son, 16 yr old daughter, and a 4 yr old daughter). I also have an individual Coaching practice ~ Personal Best Life Coaching Services, http://www.personalbestlifecoaching.net/. I am excited to be a part of Renee Trudeau & Associates and I look forward to leading & facilitating groups in Canada.

*As an RTA-Trained Facilitator, I have been personally coached by author Renee Trudeau to lead PRGs.

Registration is on a first-come, first-served basis.

Warmest Regards,

Shelley Harris, CPCC

Certified Professional Co-Active Coach & Mentor

The Empty Nest...

It's hard to believe it is August 1st, 2012, and summer is halfway through. I was telling my husband today, this has been the best summer I've had in years. I think with all the good things that are happening in my life, and the ability to follow my dreams has been a blessing and a gift. Since the last couple of months I've been in a really good place, ready to take on a new day everyday.

But....Tonight was different, after everyone went to bed, I found myself sad, emotional, and reflecting on my motherhood. If you've read my previous blogs, you know my relationship with my mother is not healthy. Since Ryan graduated from High School in June, I wanted to have a celebration for a couple of reasons. First to show him how proud we are for graduating, and secondly because he is going off to college. Our friends & Ryan were asking throughout the summer if I was going to celebrate.

For the first couple of weeks this summer, I struggled on what I should do, if I acknowledged him moving away then that makes it too real. To celebrate my son moving out just didn't sit well with me, I would tell myself it's for school, you have to let him spread his wings. I am a Certified Life Coach, I am all about people moving and growing, so why am I struggling with my son leaving. As it is now, he splits his time between my ex-husbands home and my home, so I am used to him not always being here. It's not like he is going across the country, he is only going less then a couple of hrs away.

All these thoughts ran through my head, who is going to feed him, what if he is hungry, what if he needs money, what if he needs a ride and so on and so on. I realize I've overcompensated raising my kids. I've done everything for them, in my mind I never wanted my kids to go through what I went through, so my thought is I will just do it for them. I know that wasn't right, and have made changes with my younger daughter. Whether Kayla is helping me unload the dishwasher, separate clothes for the laundry, swifer the floors, I make sure she helps. When she is a little older I will teach her how to cook, and be self sufficient. 

There are times in life, we are thrown into a job with no training, or a situation we are not comfortable with, but we always manage. We are stronger then we give ourselves credit for. So in a month from now my son will be off to college ready to start this new phase in his life. I keep saying to myself he is 18.5 yrs old, he is going to be fine, he is a young man. I keep having a positive answer for every negative question that comes in my head.

When I see his excitement to experience life on his own, I get goosebumps, I remember when I left home at 17, it changed my life. I was always beyond my years, but the life lessons I learned along the way will stay with me forever.

BTW...After sitting down with the calendar, and my son's busy schedule, the party is on hold...

He is growing up, moving on with his life, his priorities are changing, and I sit back and wonder will he have time for me? 
The answer is yes!


Thanks for reading a little piece of me....


Much Love,
Shelley

Separation Anxiety...Through the Eyes of a Child

Bonavista Newfoundland

It was a Friday night and all day I was looking forward to getting out with a dear friend. We had alot to talk about, and having an adult conversation with my girlfriend was exactly what we needed.

So early afternoon, I started to set Kevin (My husband) up so he would have an "easy" night with Kayla, I knew he would be tired, so I wanted it to be as effortless as possible. I bathed Kayla, tidy up the house, fed the cat, folded the laundry, Kayla and I cleaned up the toys, and the last thing was to make dinner for Daddy and Kayla. I went into the kitchen, and yelled out to Kayla, what do you want for dinner, she said chicken nuggets and fries, I am thinking great easy peasy, so got that cooking. 

Then I said hmmm what can I make for Daddy, and she said what about you Mommy and the first thing I thought was Uh Oh here we go, the words Kayla cannot stand to hear,  "I am going out, it's just you and Daddy tonight". Well, you would have thought I just yanked every tooth from her head. For the past several months I am noticing Kayla's anxiety is getting worse, she is at the age where she should be breaking away from feeling so attached to me. She is 4.5 years old and is literally glued to my hip, when I take a shower she sits on the toilet, when I am in the bathroom she sits on the floor at the doorway, when I sit on the couch she sits on me. She has to have me in her view at all times. Some days I am thinking, she is into her colouring, or t.v. show, so I will run downstairs real quick and throw a load of laundry in, but within a mere second, I hear screaming.

If my husband and I are talking or being affectionate, she gets so mad and interrupts, she doesn't want anyone talking to me but her. She has to always be the center of attention. We went to Gage Park in Brampton to take pictures for my son's prom, I was super excited after 4 years I was finally going to get some family pictures. Normally it is my two older children that won't take pictures. This time I thought great, they were in for the pictures, and then Kayla decides wait a minute it isn't about me, and decided to make a scene, I could feel myself starting to boil but I stayed cool, and ignored her actions.

I started telling my husband a few months ago that I think she has separation anxiety, and he never believed me, so one night he was having a hard time putting her down, and I was out for a couple of hours, she screamed and cried for me until I got home. My husband looked at me and said you are right, she does have separation anxiety. There are days that I literally run down the road for 2 seconds to pick up my older kids from their Dad's house, and Kayla flies out the front door and tries to stop the car. I have to put the car in park, walk her back up to the house, and yell out to my husband, he didn't even know she left the house.

The other day I had an important phone call, and I asked my husband can you please keep her busy while I take this phone call, I was maybe 45 mins. I hear her downstairs crying, saying she wanted her Mommy, it was very difficult to continue the conversation. I started in the kitchen, she followed me, I went upstairs she followed me, I stopped the conversation and said Kayla, I need you to go downstairs and play with Daddy, this is an important phone call. Every few mins she would come up, why are you taking so long, hurry up and get off the phone. 

I told my husband how it makes me feel, I feel smothered, and drained some days. Surprisingly though I have kept my patience, and understanding. I feel like I am the only parent, not because my husband doesn't do anything, but in her eyes I am her everything, and she expects me to do everything. My husband and I have been correcting her, and when she calls out to me, my husband will answer her back and say Daddy is home now, so you need to ask me. That is his response each time. So it does seem to be helping.

When Kevin started putting her to bed, she tried to push the boundaries for her bed time routine, but we kept vigilant. She has always been a great little girl going down at night, we have rituals, and it makes it so much easier. She has accepted now that Daddy puts her to bed. She runs over to me, kisses me good night, we tap our fingers on the wall and say...."Nighty nighty nighty, don't let the bed bugs bitey, bitey bitey", she gives me 4 kisses, and 4 hugs (Because she is 4 years old lol) and off she goes with Daddy.

Over the years, my husbands family would tell me stories about how Kevin would pull tantrums if a family member wanted to go to church, to the store or wherever. If there were times that Kevin didn't want them to go they didn't go. Then it all started making sense, I said I am guessing Kayla has the same trait from Kevin, he said he was the exact same way. Well one thing I know for sure, when I want to do something, or go somewhere I am going to do it, I won't let Kayla's actions prevent me. It's funny though when I went to India last year for almost 3 weeks, she was fine, hardly missed me lol.

Growing up I was not close to my mother, so this is all new to me, even with my older kids they were self sufficient, even at a young age. So maybe it's because she does not have any younger siblings and during the day I am all she has.

When you are looking for ways to work with the anxiety, I found these tips to be useful;

• Set clear boundaries
• Keep a schedule
• Offer rewards for good behaviour
• When you leave, leave quickly
• Don't make leaving a big production
• Communicate with your kids ahead of time what is going on
• Don't go running as soon as your child cries
• Try to get other parent/support person to handle "stuff" too
• Try not to give in
• No scary television
• Familiar Surroundings
• Consistent Daycare Provider 
• Structure

We have our work ahead of us, but each day is getting better, being consistent is key. She is such a beautiful little girl who loves life, music and dancing, she finds so much happiness in that. The most important thing is how she feels. My husband and I will continue to work each day to help her through her fears.

How do you cope when your child has separation anxiety?

Thanks for stopping by...

Much Love,

Shelley

Kayla tried to smile but she was mad at my son's prom

Getting ready for her Recital at Rose Theater

My little ham

Kayla LOVES her music

My Personal Whirlwind - Inspired by Oprah

Hey Everyone,

So you have all probably seen my tweets, seen my Facebook Statuses, or heard through word of mouth that a whole lotta of good is happening to me these days!

In October I am going to Los Angeles to see O YOU. Thanks to an OWN Ambassador dreaming big, a small group of us have been invited to Lunch With Oprah.

Wow where do I begin...

Approximately a month ago, I was on Twitter and I noticed an exchange between one of Oprah's staff members and a friend of mine regarding the OWN Ambassadors group. Well right away I got curious, and started asking my friend a few questions, and then next thing I knew I was being added to the OWN Ambassadors group by one of Oprah's staff. OWN Ambassadors are the Ultimate Viewers of OWNTV and OWNCanada. Together we grow the OWN Network through participation and viewership. 

Since joining the OWN Ambassadors group, everything has changed, it has been the light that I've needed for a long time. I am surrounded by like minded people, who I have been building friendships with. It is such an dynamic group, and I am so proud to be a part of it. For so long I have been shot down and laughed at for my dreams, and visions. I never waivered from what I wanted, and I truly believe the gifts that are being given to me are because I have not given up. I've had every possible door shut in my face, but I refuse to stop. When you are so passionate about something you don't quite, if you truly want to live your life on purpose, you have to follow your heart and just do it!

Throughout my life I always wanted to be in a role to service people, but being employed in the Logistics Industry for 25 years I felt my "gifts" were not being utilized, and I was not personally fulfilled. This past month I've been visualizing , which in turn has manifested into some really good things. "The Law of Attraction simply says that you attract into your life whatever you think about. Your dominant thoughts will find a way to manifest". 

After being off from surgery for 2 months I was to return to work July 3rd, 2012. During my leave from work, I started changing my thoughts. While I was off, my branch closed down. Initially I was like okay now what, do they place me somewhere else, work at a job I dislike. My wheels were turning, and then I seen a guest on Oprah's Super Soul Sunday say "If you are in a job you don't like you die a little bit everyday. You die before you die". Well that statement really resonated with me. The people I worked with were great, and the company was top 3 in the business, it wasn't them it was me. I knew there had to be an alternative.

While I was off I worked an endless amount of hours on my Coaching Business, and started thinking to myself, I have put so much effort into my own business ideas, how can I go back and work for someone else, and after 25 years in the Logistics industry I felt done. So I made a request and remained hopeful it would work out to benefit me, and it did! So I feel rewarded, I left on great terms, and got what I wanted. I have a few plans in place, and will start executing them when the time is right.

Currently I am working in partnership with my childhood friend Jody on workshops, retreats, and business ideas that will empower individuals. I am so excited to be venturing into business with her, she brings solid ideas, and is such a creative soul. We have a whole lotta of fun, and after 40 years of friendship we know how each other thinks. In the next few months we will be bring our ideas and workshops to you, watch for updates.

Along with all this great news, I've had a few people approach me with their business ideas, and asked if I would like to work in partnership with them, so I am pondering a few ideas. Good things are happening because I visualized it every day!

In closing I want to tell you to DREAM BIG, and go for what you want do not waiver, and just do it!

Thanks for reading...

Much Love,

Shelley


P.S. Always remember...what you put out, is what you will get back.

Learning and Feeling How To Love

So what's with the title of my blog....


Since I was 9 years old I've basically worked. I started off having a paper route, then babysitting, and then at 13 I worked in a restaurant taking orders over the phone.  When I was young my parents never bought us the latest things, or the nicest clothes, they did what they could, and at the time I didn't know any different. But once I realized I didn't have the "In" things, I would often find myself going to the "Lost and Found" at school and taking things from there just so I could have a couple of "cool" items. Once I realized that was wrong, I wanted to make money so I could buy things the proper way.

Over the years I have worked hard, and did my best raising my family. As I've indicated in previous blog's, the biggest hurdle was breaking the cycle which I did, and I am so proud of that accomplishment. Having said that though, there has been many hurdles and challenges I've faced. I know through it all, I love my kids unconditionally, but how about the rest of my family, my brothers, parents, nieces, nephews, ex-husband, friends and husband and the list goes on.

Since being home this past month, I've been feeling a shift, it is a shift of love, and fullness. What does this mean? Since the beginning of time I have been angry, I may not show it, or express it, but I had been angry with the life that was given to me. I went through the forgiveness period last year, and it felt like I forgave the people who hurt me, but it sill resided in me. So maybe I didn't truly forgive. I felt as though I did but how I feel today, and how I felt last year are way different. I know I have truly forgiven the people now.

I've had several "Aha" moments (An Oprah line for those who are not aware) this past month and I would love to share just a couple. When you grow up in an unemotional, and unattached home, you tend to feel that way with the people around you, not always but sometimes. With my kids it was never an issue, however in other relationships it was. 

A couple of weeks ago I stayed at my brothers, and I had a huge "Aha", and he doesn't even know it, and I haven't shared. I am going to share with him by sending him the link on this post. It was a fantastic weekend, I went to London, Ontario by myself and my brother and I went to our highschool reunion. I also spent quality time with my niece and nephew (My sister-in-law was working), It was so great to just spend time with them and have no other influences. 

I came home, and my husband said to me, how was it, I said it was fantastic, then I found myself breaking down. He said what's wrong, and I don't quite think he knew the magnitude of his question. All my life, I "loved" someone because I am suppose to or because the rulebooks said you have to, ie. parents, siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles etc....Now don't get me wrong I do love them all, and wish them all a great life but things just felt different now.

I came home with a Happy Heart, and my heart full of love. I have one of the greatest brothers anyone could ever ask for, I have not said it enough, nor I have appreciated him enough, or loved him enough. How much are you suppose to love, I didn't know that before, but I know it now. I can honestly say I know what it feels like to honestly love someone whole hardheartedly. I am learning to love, it's is okay to love and be attached, if this is what love is, it feels great to be able to say I love you to my family and really mean it. I think I always did, but just to afraid to show it, or express it.

My husband said to me, if you were never loved, how were you suppose to know. I realized that love heals, and having a full heart feels right, it is who I am. My husband said no one is going to look down upon you and say shame on you for loving. He is right, he is so right.

I do want to mention, I speak of my parents, I know they loved me their own way, and did the best they could but when I speak, I speak about how I felt. (Hope that makes sense)

My second "Aha" Moment, I attended the Toronto's Women Expo with my cousin Nicky. The main reason I wanted to go was to Network, spend time with Nicky, and see my great friend Janet Auty-Carlisle (My Mentor/Teacher). When I was there I realized to dream big, I was inspired to do better, and work hard to accomplish my dream.

My 3rd "Aha", recently I was welcomed into the OWN Ambassador's group (OWN Network), this is a group of strong individuals, who live life with passion, and on purpose. Also, OWN Ambassadors are the Ultimate Viewers of people who are growing OWN through participation and viewership. Being a part of this group is aligned with my vision of where I want to be, and the people I want to be surrounded by.

My closing words are, I am in a great place, I am full of love, and gratitude. Through connections, determination, and passion I will achieve my goals, that is my promise to me, and to my family.

Watch while I make it happen! :D


Take Care and Be Well!

Shelley xoxo

My Mom, myself, Jeff, and Andy

My Vision Board

My Brother Jeff and I

My House in London

I've come along way baby. Lest not forget where we came from, and the valuable lessons to be learned.

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